Keith Lemon The Film

Tonight at Bolton Cineworld I have seen Keith Lemon The Film.

Leigh Francis brings his funniest comic creation to the big screen as Keith Lemon makes his feature film debut.

Moving from his hometown of Leeds to the big lights of London, Keith Lemon (Leigh Francis) is determined to become a successful entrepreneur. Through sheer luck, Lemon finds himself an overnight billionaire after pitching The Lemon Phone, the latest must-have gadget. With success comes everything he ever wanted - money, fame and girl of his dreams Kelly Brook (starring as herself). However success is fleeting and it's not long before Lemon's moronic and reckless actions make him a failure again. The only question is how long will it take him to redeem himself and prove to the world that he's not just a loser? With a cast including some of the biggest names in show business including David Hasselhoff, Fearne Cotton, Holly Willoughby, Gary Barlow and Ronan Keating, the scene is set for Lemon to hilariously embarrass himself like never before.

The Expendables 2

Tonight I have been to see The Expendables 2

The world's greatest action stars return to the big screen in the sequel to box-office smash 'The Expendables'.

When Mr. Church (Bruce Willis) hires The Expendables for a seemingly simple mission, things take a turn for the worst when one of the team is killed. Not just that, but six pounds of weapons-grade plutonium have been stolen, placing the entire world in danger. Now, trapped behind enemy lines and with the world at risk from nuclear attack, the Expendables must overcome the odds, take their revenge and save the day. Along with returning action stars Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren, Terry Crews, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jet Li, 'The Expendables 2' has upped the action star quota with the addition of Jean-Claude Van Damme and Chuck Norris. With 'Con Air' and 'The Mechanic' director Simon West taking the reins, you can be sure that this sequel will be bigger than the cast's biceps.

The Bourne Legacy

Last Night I went to see The Bourne Legacy.

The all-new adrenaline-pumping chapter in the groundbreaking Bourne franchise.

Set at the same time as 'The Bourne Ultimatum', 'The Bourne Legacy' follows the fallout of Jason Bourne's actions against the shadowy Blackbriar organisation. While his actions may have exposed Blackbriar's illegal operations, Bourne's mission has resulted in a life or death struggle for another agent - Aaron Cross (Jeremy Renner). Following the killing of Guardian journalist Simon Ross (Paddy Considine) and Congress's investigation into the Blackbriar program, CIA agent Byer (Edward Norton) decides to shut down all of his covert operations and wipe out any evidence. This includes all agents similar to Bourne, such as Aaron Cross and their handlers. Escaping with scientist Marta Shearing (Rachel Weisz), Cross must fight to stay alive, discover the truth about his mission and stay one step ahead of Byer and his men. With Jeremy Renner's recent success in 'Marvel's Avengers Assemble', 'The Bourne Legacy' sees him establish himself as one of Hollywood's leading action stars.

Ted

Last night I went to see Ted.

A grown man is saddled with a potty-mouthed teddy bear in this raunchy comedy from the creator of 'Family Guy'.

On Christmas Day, an eight-year-old boy clutches his beloved teddy bear to his chest and wishes it could talk. Bad idea. For this is a wish that comes true, with unexpected consequences. Many years later, John (Mark Wahlberg) is an adult. So too is Ted (voiced by Seth MacFarlane) - the walking, talking little furry companion who refuses to leave his side. That's something of a problem, because John has fallen hopelessly in love with the beautiful Lori (Mila Kunis). And she's laying down the law. In order for their relationship to progress, the foul-mouthed, hard-drinking, drug-taking, womanising little bear has to go. This is the first feature film from Seth MacFarlane, creator of cult TV hit 'Family Guy'. A near-the-knuckle comedy blending CGI and live action seamlessly, it introduces the baddest bear you've ever seen!